On personality types
Is it all nonsense?
This is the question I come back to when I think of personality types. What do I benefit if I identify myself as an introvert, or an ambivert, or an extrovert?
Any personality test I've ever taken marks me as an extrovert (for the record, my Meyers-Briggs is ENFJ), but if I'm honest, I meet all the introvert criteria. And I have times when I feel ESPECIALLY introverted.
Like, NOW.
Can I look at my life through some kind of introvert lens and suddenly understand myself?
Right now it feels like a STRUGGLE to be around people. Like, I can barely do it. Don't talk to me, don't interact with me, you're making me sad by your very presence. Conversation, especially with more than one person, feels exhausting. I want to sit in silence, but then I'm bored.
Is that even introversion? Or am I having a psychotic break? What's wrong with me?
I don't even know.
Perhaps the worst part is I am waking up every morning praying to be something other than what I am right now -- I want to be cheerful and encouraging, embodying the attitude of someone who cares deeply about people and is excited to see them. I think this is biblical, and right. But I am having a heck of a time getting there.
So what am I missing? I'm making a particular effort to be thankful, and I wonder if this flood of inexplicable negative emotions is spiritual warfare against my intention to cultivate true gratitude. I'm trying to press on, but today it's not easy.
This is the question I come back to when I think of personality types. What do I benefit if I identify myself as an introvert, or an ambivert, or an extrovert?
Any personality test I've ever taken marks me as an extrovert (for the record, my Meyers-Briggs is ENFJ), but if I'm honest, I meet all the introvert criteria. And I have times when I feel ESPECIALLY introverted.
Like, NOW.
Can I look at my life through some kind of introvert lens and suddenly understand myself?
Right now it feels like a STRUGGLE to be around people. Like, I can barely do it. Don't talk to me, don't interact with me, you're making me sad by your very presence. Conversation, especially with more than one person, feels exhausting. I want to sit in silence, but then I'm bored.
Is that even introversion? Or am I having a psychotic break? What's wrong with me?
I don't even know.
Perhaps the worst part is I am waking up every morning praying to be something other than what I am right now -- I want to be cheerful and encouraging, embodying the attitude of someone who cares deeply about people and is excited to see them. I think this is biblical, and right. But I am having a heck of a time getting there.
So what am I missing? I'm making a particular effort to be thankful, and I wonder if this flood of inexplicable negative emotions is spiritual warfare against my intention to cultivate true gratitude. I'm trying to press on, but today it's not easy.
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